Blood Dungeon Is Vampire Survivors with more blood and full-frontal nudity

Let’s cut to the chase: play Blood Dungeon.

The Imię Says It All

Messhof, the studio behind Nidhogg and Vampire Survivors, has a knack for titles that perfectly encapsulate their games. In this case, Blood Dungeon is exactly what you expect: a low-fi, unapologetically crude take on the addictive “bullet heaven” gameplay.

It’s like opening a box of Sugar Balls cereal – there’s no confusion about what you’re getting. And that’s precisely why I love it. In a gaming landscape often obsessed with hyper-realism and complex narratives, Blood Dungeon dares to be stupid, and for that, I am eternally grateful.

A Paint-Splattered Masterpiece (of Chaos)

Blood Dungeon is essentially Vampire Survivors if it were remade by a 12-year-old armed with Microsoft Paint. The pixel art has been replaced with misshapen doodles colored in with what appears to be a box of magic markers. Splotchy blue birds and disembodied hands roam around 2D arenas that look like they were made from texture stamps. It’s the gaming equivalent of finding out your kid isn’t paying attention in math class, but somehow, it works.

The core gameplay loop remains familiar. You pick a misfit character (my personal favorite is the nude dude who moves by cartwheeling, affectionately known as the Skinja), equip them with starting weapons and perks, and navigate levels while your weapon auto-fires at hordes of enemies. The emphasis is on building DPS quickly, making for a more streamlined experience than Vampire Survivors.

Więcej Action, Less Standing Around

One of the most noticeable differences between Blood Dungeon and its inspiration is the inclusion of platforming elements. You’re not just standing around mowing down enemies; you’re slinking around obstacles, dodging swarms, and clambering up chain fences. This adds a layer of dynamism that keeps things interesting.

Another key difference is the pacing. Vampire Survivors often requires a 15-30 minute commitment per run, with slow-building tension and frequent early deaths. Blood Dungeon escalates much quicker, offering multi-tiered victories and making even bad runs feel worthwhile.

The High Score Hustle

Blood Dungeon is all about chasing high scores. Beating a level is fun, but obliterating your friends’ bone counts and rubbing it in their faces? That’s the real reward. I found myself getting competitive (okay, toxic) during my playthrough, sending screenshots of my scores to fellow reviewers just to gloat.

It’s Called Blood Dungeon for a Reason

And yes, did I mention that the game is called Blood Dungeon? That’s pretty crucial. It sets the tone perfectly and prepares you for the glorious chaos that awaits.

A Quick Prototype or a Hidden Gem?

While Blood Dungeon might not revolutionize the “bullet heaven” subgenre, it offers a unique and enjoyable experience. It’s a quick prototype with limited levels and some questionable design choices (underwater levels with oxygen bubbles?). But for those who appreciate its crude charm and addictive gameplay, it’s a hidden gem.

The Verdict: Embrace the Blood

If you’re looking for a deep, complex gaming experience, Blood Dungeon isn’t for you. But if you want to embrace the chaos, chase high scores, and revel in its unapologetic crudeness, then give it a shot. You might just find yourself addicted.

Blood Dungeon will be released Aug. 25 on Switch, Switch 2, PlayStation 5, Windows PC, and Xbox Series X. The game was reviewed on Windows PC using a prerelease download code provided by Messhof. You can find additional information about Polygon’s ethics policy here.